What Are You Doing With You?

Writers can appear to have split personalities at times. Fiction writers can be especially notorious in this area because our characters live in our heads. But that’s for another blog.

In the community of Christian writers, we form writers groups, select critique partners, participate in workshops and conferences, and brainstorm with each other. In these activities, we encourage each other, challenge each other and teach each other. Why? To grow into better writers.

And then we turn around and compete with each other for an agent or for one of those coveted, yet increasingly rare, slots with traditional publishers.

And we rejoice and celebrate when someone else gets one of those slots. I must admit that, at times, I pray for God to make my rejoicing and celebrating in the success of someone else sincere and genuine.

There are times the spirits of envy and jealousy try to impose their ugly resentfulness on my heart. The questioning starts: What am I doing with my life? Am I really cut out for this? Why them? Why not me?

Eventually, I take this to God. Sometimes right away. Sometimes feeling sorry for myself lingers. There’s nothing like a good pity party. As long as you keep it to three seconds, max.

flickr photos lance scurvin

I love how He patiently waits for me to come to my spiritual senses and approach His throne of grace.

He asks me, “Did I call you to be that writer who just got the four book contract?” “Did I call you to be that writer who just won the Carol Award?” Of course, He didn’t.

Then He asks: “What are you doing to be the Henry I called you to be?”

He reminds me of the passage in John 21:19-22 where Peter asks how John is going to die (no rivalry there!), and Jesus replies: “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? As for you, follow me.”

In other words, follow the plan He has called me to, put my trust in Him, and be the Henry He has called me to be.

What are you doing with the you He called to be?